There are so many myths that circle elopements and it’s fair to say that all of them are just wrong! Often the term comes up and people instantly think secret pregnancies or disapproval from families.
These thoughts, however, often stem from the fact that most people believe any ceremony that doesn’t include members of your nuclear and extended family is wrong. Therefore the only reason couples would choose such is because they have something to hide. Wrong again.
Now we will acknowledge that decades ago, elopements did not have the best reputations, and often whenever couples fled to Gretna Green to get married, it was indeed because there was some shady stuff going on. However, it is essential to know that in these recent times, elopements are just as legitimate as traditional weddings!
Eloping is a non-traditional way of getting married that switches focus from guest experience to couple experience. And better still, it involves more fun and unique ways of saying ‘I do.’
So here, we will be busting the most common elopement myths while shedding light on the truths around elopements.
Elopement Myth 1: Elopements Are Disgraceful
This is one of the most common myths about elopements. Honestly, what is the first image that comes to mind when you hear a couple eloped in a Las Vegas church? Probably two people with some disgraceful secret seeking to get married someplace where no one knows them. Well, that couldn’t be further from the truth! While elopements aren’t large traditional weddings, they certainly aren’t ceremonies of disgrace and woe. In fact, couples who elope in these recent times are super deliberate about their actions and know precisely what they are after. They know what they want their wedding days to feel like and probably prefer the bustle of Las Vegas to a quiet wedding on a beach.
So to bust this myth, elopements aren’t disgraceful; they are absolutely graceful!
Elopement Myth 2: Elopements Are Lonely Affairs
There is this belief that elopement involves only the couple and an officiant. Wrong. The bedrock of elopements is a ceremony where the couple’s experience is the priority, not the guest experience. So long as everyone involved knows this, you can proceed however you want.
So if you would like to invite your besties, your parents, or just a small group of friends, you absolutely can. And if you don’t want to, there is nothing lonely about doing something special and intimate with your partner. Truth is, some people find any solitary activity lonely therefore would naturally believe this about elopements. However, this doesn’t mean that everyone will feel the same. If what you desire is a ceremony where you won’t fret over guest entertainment or comfort, and simply just be with your partner, don’t let anyone deter you from getting that.
To bust this myth, elopements aren’t lonely, they are intimate.
Elopement Myth 3: Elopements are Eleventh-Hour Decisions
Now, the entire reason this myth exists is because there is a certain presumption that elopements are unplanned ceremonies. This, of course, is false. Perhaps decades and centuries ago, couples leaped off beds into chapels to get wed but the modern elopement certainly involves planning. The difference between traditional wedding planning and elopements, however, is that eloping requires lesser planning. Which can also be considered a huge plus and one major reason modern couples favor eloping. So rather than weeks spent going from place to place in search of reception halls for hundreds, eloping couples spend convenient hours of the day visiting Pinterest or Google. And rather than overthinking how to pay staff to cater to one hundred and fifty guests, they rent boats or yachts.
That being said, elopements are very convenient if you want to get married within a brief time frame but this doesn’t mean that they are unplanned or non-deliberate.
To bust this myth, elopements can happen in months or weeks, either way, a lot of thoughts and heart go into it!
Elopement Myth 4: Elopements aren’t Real Weddings
Let’s address this myth with this question; what is a wedding? In the simplest terms, a wedding is a ceremony that ends with two people united in marriage. So as long as at the end of an elopement ceremony you and your partner are legally recognized as spouses, elopements are as real as any wedding gets!
Whoever insists on this myth likely wants to see grand halls and hundreds of guests with overflowing buffet tables, loud bands, and the jiggle. Of course, there is nothing wrong with having all of these but the point is both traditional weddings and elopements are real weddings. You can simply look at it as going to the same destination through whatever path feels smoothest to you.
Elopement Myth 5: Elopements are Selfish
This is another very common elopement myth out there. It’s also one of those beliefs that aren’t necessarily voiced out but can be sensed in downturned lips and sniffles. If anyone makes you feel inconsiderate for wanting to elope, remind them that people are different. What could make Anna and Paul feel like the most special couple on their big day might not make Anne and Peter feel like the most special couple on their big day. Besides, at the crux of it all, the couple’s needs, the memories they want to look back at decades into the future with fondness, is what matters.
So no, there is nothing selfish about planning a ceremony that’s all about you and your partner. It doesn’t mean you’re actively trying to exclude them. And don’t forget that, it’s your wedding and not theirs so do what makes you happy!
To bust this myth, an elopement isn’t selfish but a ceremony chosen by a couple to make themselves happy.
With all of these busted myths, hopefully, you can see the beauty in eloping. It has now been redefined to mean something unique and special for a couple who wants their day to be all about them!